The Void.

I am not happy with my life.

And I don’t know how to fix the unhappiness that I feel. There is something missing in my life. I don’t know what it is, but I can feel the emptiness, this void in me.

It’s not entirely about happiness too, it’s about feeling fulfilled with the life that I am living.

I thought that graduating from college would be the solution to this void. Then I experienced life after college and that pride that I felt from graduating slowly disappeared. Then depression and rock bottom appeared. I was at a high point of my life and I reached my goal, one of my life goals…

Then what?

Then I felt like getting a new job was the next solution to this void. I wasn’t happy with my job. Then after months of struggling and sending applications, I finally got a new job. A job that I studied and got my degree for. But, I was struggling and I’m still currently struggling. I know that it takes time to get used to it and I need a lot more patience.

But, getting a new job wasn’t filling that void.

I go through life everyday and I don’t feel like myself. And I haven’t been happy, truly happy in a long time. I haven’t had a genuine smile or laughed in a long time. It’s all fake, the smiles and laughs that I’ve been having  for the past couple of months.

I’ve experienced this many times in my life.

But it feels different this time. Because I always worked hard towards the goal of graduating college. And since that goal is done, I don’t know.

Maybe I just need to get away from home for a little bit.

If you are struggling and don’t know what to do with your life.
You are NOT alone.

Let’s help each other.

-Mel

 

 

 

 

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