I give up.
My life has been too overwhelming, especially in the past couple of months.
It hasn’t gone any better and I give up.
I haven’t had any moments of feeling happy or even content with life.
I have spent the past couple of days (which was during Christmas) feeling so isolated with my relatives. Every time I come into the room, the energy changes and they all look at me in a different perspective than before.
I can just feel the stares and awkwardness whenever I’m around them.
They don’t really talk to me. If they see me sitting by myself, they don’t do anything and just leave me alone.
I’m at the point where I give up.
I already feel shitty about myself and when my family doesn’t try to talk to me, I give up.
I worked today. Apparently there was plans to go ice skating and such, but I didn’t know about it. So I worked today. Then I got off early and texted to see what was going on. Then my brother took a long time to contact me back. My anxiety grew and grew. So I gave up. When he finally called back and after my panic attack, I didn’t care anymore of being with my cousins.
If they don’t make an effort, I’m not going to.
They probably wouldn’t want me there anyways. I’ll ruin all their fun.
I give up on them.
There was many moments while driving around and crying where I just wanted to give up on life entirely.
It sucks when you feel so bad about your life, and there’s no one to support you.
Or at least, there’s no one that stays.
Or even tries.