My feelings written into words.

I could feel it today.

Depression was creeping up into my life.

Instead of fighting it, I embraced it.

Because I knew that something was wrong and I just shrugged it off.

I needed depression to come as weird as it sounds.

Because I needed to come into terms with how I truly feel.

Whenever I have nights like this, when I need to cry.

I listen to music that captures how I feel.

My favorite band ever since I was 15 is Paramore. 

& I don’t think it’s too common to grow up with your favorite band. Somehow they write songs that feels like they reached into my heart and turned my feelings into words. 

14 years of songs that explains how I feel.

I had many nights like this where I just lay in bed, have a song or two that explains my feelings on repeat and just cry….

Because sometimes that’s what you need… is to cry.

On a side note:

I was supposed to go to a Paramore concert 4 days after graduating college. I was the happiest I have ever been that day.  The day after graduation I was at my lowest point. Depression hit me so hard that day and the days, weeks, months, years following graduation. I couldn’t go to my favorite band’s concert because my depression hit me so hard. & I feel like the reason why I couldn’t go is because the venue was at my college..

Years later, I’m going back to see my favorite band (in a month, uhh in a couple of weeks). I already know I’m going to cry.

I’m so thankful for music.

For being able to create something that fully encompasses my feelings and puts it into music and lyrics.

-Mel

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