Depression sucks.

I held it in all day.
The frustration, the anxiety, the moments of feeling depressed.

I had to. I was at work. As soon as I turned right on the main street after leaving work.

All the feelings that I held inside for 8 hours  just exploded.

I spent that 30ish min drive completely destroyed.

I was at a very low point. I pretty much hit rock bottom, a place that I never wanted to be ever again.

That drive included moments of:

  • uncontrollable crying
  • telling myself that I hated myself for getting to this point
  • telling myself  “please make it stop”
  • telling myself that the life and people around me just don’t need me anymore
  • asking myself  “WHY AM I NEVER GOOD ENOUGH?”
  • not being able to breathe
  • because of lots of heavy breathing
  • telling myself that if it does get to that lowest point call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline


This is reality. This is depression.

This is part of the depression that I hate to experience because it takes such a huge toll on my mind and my body.

It’s 9pm…3 hours later and I am physically and mentally exhausted from that rock bottom explosion.

It sucks. It sucks. It sucks.



1 Comment

  1. I went through a short period of depression when my General Anxiety Disorder had become too overwhelming to handle.
If you don’t mind me suggesting, listen to Dr Joe Dispenza on youtube. He talks a lot about how to deal with emotions and loss. This is one of his talks on impact theory that might help

    All the best, let me know what you think, if you do decide to listen to his talks. His helped me look at my GAD differently


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s