I Gave Myself a Mental Health Day.

If you read my last post…then it probably gave you an insight on why I’m giving myself a mental health day today.

I knew when I got the call saying that my work was open after the “Stay at Home” order, I knew that I was not ready to go back.

The anxiety and panic that I was experiencing was too overwhelming. And it’s not something new. But it escalated to new heights last week. To a point that it has never reached before.

So given the opportunity to use my sick hours (which expires next month on my 1 year), I used it to give myself a sick day or in my case… a MENTAL HEALTH DAY.

It’s not a day to be lazy in my pajamas watching movies.

I needed another day just to process everything.

I know that I have some anxiety and fear over going back to work tomorrow.

So I spent the beginning of the day being busy. I worked on my planners and bullet journals, cleaned, made my lunch for the next day and made a peppermint chocolate loaf (from a mix that I got from Trader Joes back in December and didn’t have time to bake it until now). I watched Disneyland vlogs/shows/fireworks online to boost my mood.

In a couple of hours, before I start winding down for bed. I know that my anxiety will start asking me loads of questions starting with “WHAT IF..”, and will provide scenarios in my head of the worst possible outcomes for tomorrow. I’m going to write it all out, so it won’t pop into my head as I’m falling asleep.

And right now, my mindset is… whatever happens, happens.

I have been looking through this entire situation with FEAR & ANXIETY.

The fear and anxiety that was transferred by social media, the news and my co-worker.

And I just saw this one post on Instagram that basically said THANK YOU to all those helping with this situation. Looking at this entire situation with gratitude.

Be thankful for those medical professionals that are going to work everyday. Be thankful for all the grocery stores and other stores open that are providing us the opportunity to buy food and whatever we need. Be thankful for the teachers that are not at schools, providing lessons online at the drop of the hat.

I’m missing so many other people and professionals.

But THANK YOU.

As much as anxiety will probably affect me in the next couple of hours or tomorrow morning, I need to look on the brighter side of things.

When I’m at work probably frustrated with whatever is going on, I need to think that I am getting paid. Others were not that fortunate with their jobs.

I have the option of going to work. Others going to work probably don’t have that option. My mom and brother work in the hospital, they don’t have that option.

I’m glad that I was able to take this day off and gain a different perspective on everything that is going on.

I felt like if I went straight to work, I would probably feel stressed right away and continue on that negativity train.

If you ever get an opportunity to give yourself a Mental Health Day, take it and live it to its fullest.

-MEL

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