I actually had a pretty good week at work, was soo ready for a 3 day weekend & here I am crying…. I feel so depressed and I feel like crap. Last week, I talked about my relationships to my therapist. My relationships with: exes, friends, cousins, etc. As I talked about each type of […]
Author: melalarcon
WHEN_____, THEN I WILL FEEL____.
These past couple of months have been….sh*tty. Y U P. No surprise there. If this year has taught me anything, it’s that we have no idea what the future holds. When the pandemic happened, I kept on thinking about different “future” scenarios and how it will make things better. My thoughts went like this: When […]
Finding the Positive in the Negative.
It’s finally August 1st. July was a f*cking hard month. Mentally, Physically and Emotionally. I turned the page on my calendar from July to August. A calendar where I write down one positive thing that happened in the day. If it was a hard day, I made myself find one positive thing that occurred. Many […]
I Deserve Better.
It’s 4am on a work day. I hate waking up in the middle of the night and not falling back asleep. But I guess 4am is the time for realizations. Yesterday was a very frustrating day at work. It was like, a tiny thing in the universe was out of sync and it made my […]
Anxious Thoughts While Feeling Sick During a Pandemic
Anxiety & COVID-19 are not a good mix. It doesn’t help that regular symptoms that I get are similar to symptoms of COVID-19. I’ve had headaches and migraines for years now. Anxiety always gives me shortness of breath. I commonly get sore throats. Today felt different waking up. I didn’t feel 100%. I felt 45%. […]
Missing.
(This will be an unedited post because I have to go to work) In the past couple of years, I’ve associated crying with: depression, anxiety, being overwhelmed and frustrated. This morning, I was driving on my way to work listening to the same playlist I listen to every morning. And then, I listened to Ben […]
Trauma & Changes.
These past two weeks have been hard for me: emotionally, mentally and physically. My week off was far from relaxing and my week back was overwhelming. The very first day of my “vacation”, I decided to share my feelings towards this guy I’ve been talking to. I started to have feelings for him & I […]
3:47 A.M.
Oh here we are again.. It’s morning and the sun isn’t up yet. And I’ve been up for almost 2 hours. Out of everything that I experience with depression and anxiety, I hate insomnia the most. I’ve experienced insomnia even before I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. When I was younger, I would wake […]
T H E R A P Y
I’ve spent the first couple days of my vacation doing absolutely nothing. I’m so physically, mentally and emotionally drained from work and the other aspects of my life that cause anxiety and depression. So I’ve just been switching from the couch to my bed watching Netflix, Youtube or Disney +. I have a consultation with […]
My Perspective(s) on Relationships.
I’ve been thinking about how my perspectives on relationships have changed throughout my lifetime. I wrote a post… a couple of weeks ago. Stating that I want to be loved by someone. After being single for so long, I just couldn’t understand why I couldn’t find someone who likes me… for me. I was very […]
