Tomorrow is the start of September. And I honestly don’t know how August just suddenly ended. Because I feel like I didn’t fully experience this month. It was a crazy month. It became a month of uncertainty. I didn’t know what each day consisted of. And there were nights where I would worry on what […]
Tag: insomnia
Anxiety ruins my life.
I just had a first date with this guy I’ve been talking to, for about a month. I thought the date went well and I want to see him again. But immediately, as soon as I said bye to him. My anxiety kicked in. What if he didn’t like me? What if all the hype […]
I had a panic attack at my cousin’s wedding.
It’s been a couple of months since my last post. But I thought it was important to share what happened on the day of my cousin’s wedding. My last post talked about how I felt so out of place and felt like I didn’t belong in my family, when I was at the rehearsal dinner. […]
I don’t feel like I belong in my family
I can’t sleep because all the anxiety I had being with relatives today. I was at a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner for my cousin’s wedding. I’m not part of the wedding. But since my parents are part of it, then I got to go. Same with the dinner. I walked into the venue. Dressed in […]
I Deserve Better.
It’s 4am on a work day. I hate waking up in the middle of the night and not falling back asleep. But I guess 4am is the time for realizations. Yesterday was a very frustrating day at work. It was like, a tiny thing in the universe was out of sync and it made my […]
3:47 A.M.
Oh here we are again.. It’s morning and the sun isn’t up yet. And I’ve been up for almost 2 hours. Out of everything that I experience with depression and anxiety, I hate insomnia the most. I’ve experienced insomnia even before I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. When I was younger, I would wake […]
4 AM
This is the THIRD Saturday in a row where I have woken up at 4am. No nightmares. Not feeling too cold or too hot. No loud noises waking me up. Just naturally waking up at 4am. And I wrote my previous post around 11pm last night and fell asleep around 12:45am. So yea… I didn’t […]
Going from anxiety to depression.
I am very familiar with depression. I am very familiar with anxiety. & I’m very familiar with depression transitioning to anxiety. But… The transition from anxiety to depression is something that is unfamiliar to me. And I don’t like it… I had many moments of anxiety within the past week. And a million more moments […]