“It’s National Suicide Prevention Week. And just a couple of hours ago, I wanted to end my life.”

It’s National Suicide Prevention Week. Yesterday was World Suicide Prevention Day. And just a couple of hours ago, I wanted to end my life. Typically around this time, I will talk about the importance of this week. But this year, I have been quiet about it. These past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind […]

All I’ve Ever Wanted in these Past 15+ years of Struggling with a Mental Illness is a HUG.

The most simplest form of human connection: A HUG. And that’s something I want, but don’t get. But it’s something that I want/need when I’m struggling with depression or anxiety. I get those awkward side hugs from people, second-long hugs from relatives and hugs from my students. But those hugs are just for greetings…saying hello […]

7 months.

Tonight. I’m letting my mind and body sleep naturally. Whenever it is tired and wants to rest. No melatonin. No sleep apps. No podcasts. No audiobooks. I’m letting my mind and body experience something that it’s not used to. Letting my mind and body sleep when it’s ready, not because I’m forcing it to. I […]

Running away.

Literally & Mentally. Anxiety & Depression had made me freeze in certain situations and “run away” from my problems literally and mentally.  There are many times at work when I get too overwhelmed and get anxious about a situation that I freeze and just move away to avoid it or try to block it from […]